Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
