Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
