Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Randomize
