is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I look excited, but its just a facade.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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