yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
