Buhtt sex?
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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