I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...