There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
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Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
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Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
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