i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
