so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
