I must be too annoying 4 u.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
We don't watch enough power rangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip πππ
Your skills amaze me
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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