I'm in a cab, in a strange city, and my driver looks like he's going to eat me. My facebook password is **** I want you to have the one thing I hold dearest to my heart.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
