I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.