he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.