Texts From Last Night

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  (810): View more from Michigan

  i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!

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  (810): i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck! http://tfl.nu/jvh5
  Replies (8) Good night (2233) Bad night (4847)
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  (506): View more from New Brunswick

  Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?

  (1-506): View more from New Brunswick

  Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to

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  (506): Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh? (1-506): Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to http://tfl.nu/xpu9
  Replies (16) Good night (3167) Bad night (763)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest

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  (518): Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest http://tfl.nu/34vq
  Replies (12) Good night (2815) Bad night (817)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.

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  (636): My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week. http://tfl.nu/9o0t
  Replies (5) Good night (3721) Bad night (556)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.

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  (302): I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years. http://tfl.nu/sw0p
  Replies (4) Good night (850) Bad night (3396)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn

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  (401): The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn http://tfl.nu/nlq4
  Replies (5) Good night (2629) Bad night (1219)
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  (631): View more from New York

  She told me I should be a condom model.

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  (631): She told me I should be a condom model. http://tfl.nu/0ukw
  Replies (14) Good night (7064) Bad night (849)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?

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  (410): Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"? http://tfl.nu/6yo8
  Replies (10) Good night (752) Bad night (1443)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?

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  (715): His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him? http://tfl.nu/r9a3
  Replies (21) Good night (1324) Bad night (1720)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.

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  (617): Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won. http://tfl.nu/nnbm
  Replies (13) Good night (1223) Bad night (2038)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.

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  (612): I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise. http://tfl.nu/awbv
  Replies (4) Good night (1446) Bad night (489)
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  (607): View more from New York

  You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.

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  (607): You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were. http://tfl.nu/pdic
  Replies (3) Good night (1303) Bad night (476)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.

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  (516): I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are. http://tfl.nu/mo3l
  Replies (6) Good night (1853) Bad night (507)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.

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  (703): there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners. http://tfl.nu/h528
  Replies (3) Good night (586) Bad night (322)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?

  (720): View more from Colorado

  I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.

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  (319): How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you? (720): I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be. http://tfl.nu/ix10
  Replies (6) Good night (949) Bad night (180)

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