You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
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