Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I intend to get homeless drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
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