Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
