My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
