Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
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