I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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