i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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