Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
why do cheetos always look like penises
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
Randomize
