does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
