I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
