Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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