So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
