We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
