I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
