Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.