No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Randomize
