In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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