She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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