do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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