Texts From Last Night

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  (815): View more from Illinois

  My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.

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  (815): My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY. http://tfl.nu/imc8
  Replies (14) Good night (829) Bad night (3228)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  watch out for the queen of hearts

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  fuucck i forgot ab her

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  (610): walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat (215): watch out for the queen of hearts (610): fuucck i forgot ab her http://tfl.nu/mo46
  Replies (15) Good night (5641) Bad night (885)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  and my herpes radar will keep us safe

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  (843): and my herpes radar will keep us safe http://tfl.nu/p103
  Replies (25) Good night (3505) Bad night (768)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out

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  (205): soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out http://tfl.nu/q1wd
  Replies (15) Good night (5371) Bad night (879)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.

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  (732): there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me. http://tfl.nu/v26u
  Replies (10) Good night (3949) Bad night (1026)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.

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  (313): I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life. http://tfl.nu/7obq
  Replies (9) Good night (776) Bad night (4270)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.

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  (978): i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite. http://tfl.nu/yk7i
  Replies (22) Good night (8301) Bad night (821)
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  (442): View more from California

  her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.

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  (442): her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite. http://tfl.nu/rdq2
  Replies (12) Good night (3638) Bad night (999)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.

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  (850): If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me. http://tfl.nu/s2pe
  Replies (20) Good night (1612) Bad night (5014)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.

  (765): View more from Indiana

  yay hump day

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  (812): Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra. (765): yay hump day http://tfl.nu/qbqw
  Replies (7) Good night (2256) Bad night (687)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.

  (540): View more from Virginia

  Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together

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  (816): First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman. (540): Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together http://tfl.nu/87tf
  Replies (3) Good night (1081) Bad night (494)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.

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  (412): So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T. http://tfl.nu/y888
  Replies (4) Good night (1587) Bad night (603)
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  (573): View more from Missouri

  You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times

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  (573): You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times http://tfl.nu/9yzl
  Replies (7) Good night (840) Bad night (429)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!

  (1-404): View more from Georgia

  Be safe. And I hate you.

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  (404): Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND! (1-404): Be safe. And I hate you. http://tfl.nu/32xo
  Replies (3) Good night (1312) Bad night (414)
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  (949): View more from California

  There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.

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  (949): There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain. http://tfl.nu/am0u
  Replies (0) Good night (598) Bad night (291)

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