Texts From Last Night

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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?

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  (256): Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face? http://tfl.nu/ju4e
  Replies (7) Good night (716) Bad night (2822) Order T-Shirt
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  (212): View more from New York

  You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.

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  (212): You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido. http://tfl.nu/8t44
  Replies (36) Good night (1035) Bad night (5045)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.

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  (224): i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study. http://tfl.nu/7goo
  Replies (14) Good night (4057) Bad night (821) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes

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  (405): i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes http://tfl.nu/6w2z
  Replies (10) Good night (5387) Bad night (966) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  My ATM looks so different sober.

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  (614): My ATM looks so different sober. http://tfl.nu/aska
  Replies (7) Good night (2196) Bad night (688) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.

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  (631): Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants. http://tfl.nu/35y8
  Replies (9) Good night (2458) Bad night (903) Order T-Shirt
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  (214): View more from Texas

  My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you

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  (214): My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you http://tfl.nu/i385
  Replies (12) Good night (3828) Bad night (837) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.

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  (770): She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking. http://tfl.nu/77kz
  Replies (9) Good night (2933) Bad night (566) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying

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  (717): best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying http://tfl.nu/r0td
  Replies (15) Good night (585) Bad night (2011) Order T-Shirt
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.

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  (513): I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda. http://tfl.nu/j95t
  Replies (20) Good night (2040) Bad night (770) Order T-Shirt
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.

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  (732): I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster. http://tfl.nu/5e26
  Replies (14) Good night (2113) Bad night (439) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me

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  (+44): They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me http://tfl.nu/sbg9
  Replies (3) Good night (791) Bad night (284) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"

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  (716): I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!" http://tfl.nu/0j2g
  Replies (14) Good night (1347) Bad night (314) Order T-Shirt
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby

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  (623): I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby http://tfl.nu/cxps
  Replies (6) Good night (806) Bad night (260) Order T-Shirt
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...

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  (828): just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever... http://tfl.nu/nfkk
  Replies (5) Good night (682) Bad night (475) Order T-Shirt

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