Texts From Last Night

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  (718): View more from New York

  so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood

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  (718): so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood http://tfl.nu/a9i9
  Replies (11) Good night (693) Bad night (1605)
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  (951): View more from California

  I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?

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  (951): I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right? http://tfl.nu/4fsw
  Replies (22) Good night (2526) Bad night (753)
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.

  (1-614): View more from Ohio

  I'm not sure what to say to that.

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  (614): I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC. (1-614): I'm not sure what to say to that. http://tfl.nu/ot0k
  Replies (29) Good night (752) Bad night (2669)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.

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  (402): I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over. http://tfl.nu/b7hl
  Replies (62) Good night (8132) Bad night (1019)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.

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  (847): john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer. http://tfl.nu/ic81
  Replies (5) Good night (629) Bad night (2907)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?

  (1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Don't tempt me, I need beer money.

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  (306): So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob? (1-306): Don't tempt me, I need beer money. http://tfl.nu/pmfd
  Replies (26) Good night (6122) Bad night (966)
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  (845): View more from New York

  Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul

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  (845): Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul http://tfl.nu/g7t1
  Replies (4) Good night (714) Bad night (3394)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame

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  (708): either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame http://tfl.nu/9sw5
  Replies (9) Good night (5076) Bad night (957)
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  (415): View more from California

  i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.

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  (415): i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting. http://tfl.nu/f0mf
  Replies (16) Good night (2539) Bad night (969)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.

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  (360): Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover. http://tfl.nu/pu5x
  Replies (4) Good night (864) Bad night (1420)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?

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  (256): Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters? http://tfl.nu/uct5
  Replies (6) Good night (1096) Bad night (588)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you

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  (302): But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you http://tfl.nu/t5np
  Replies (12) Good night (1641) Bad night (443)
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  (760): View more from California

  Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.

  (432): View more from Texas

  You're so wise.

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  (760): Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants. (432): You're so wise. http://tfl.nu/48zw
  Replies (3) Good night (945) Bad night (460)
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  (940): View more from Texas

  Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.

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  (940): Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them. http://tfl.nu/2war
  Replies (13) Good night (647) Bad night (1200)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.

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  (610): Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college. http://tfl.nu/99u6
  Replies (2) Good night (1322) Bad night (325)

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