Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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