whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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