I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
