apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
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btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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