Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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