what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
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