four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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