Im at strip club and am horny
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Randomize
