8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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