Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
