Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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