Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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