just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
