a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
COCAINE IS GR8
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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