What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
