we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
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