I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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